some people ask me why i blog, why anyone blogs for that matter, and i become a bit embarrassed, not knowing what to answer. others say i should write more; do it for a living, and i become a bit embarrassed, mumbling something about how i’d love to, but… there’s always been that little but. i guess it’s because the latter meets the former; i’d love to write, but i don’t want to be judged on doing it (or worse, on what i’ve written.) it may not seem like it, but i do get embarrassed quite easily when it comes to my own contribution to the world. it’s only fairly recently that i’ve learnt to take compliments for what they are, and to advertise my own set of skills, at least to some extent.
so. truth be told. there’s a little carrie bradshaw living somewhere inside me. i can feel her jostling for attention as i’m tripping around in dresses and high heels, jumping over puddles as i go, always thinking about how to retell whatever i just experienced. it’s not that i have a need to tell the world about me, myself, and i. it’s more a need of letting out all the stories that arise from the situations i find myself in. there’s always something to be gained from every encounter in life. either you learn something, or you get a laugh out of it. either way, for me, in my mind, it always transforms into a story that urges to be put to paper. and that’s pretty much how it’s been all my life. i’ve always been at my best when i’ve had something to write on.
not seeing myself as a traditional journalist though, i skipped the idea of ever making a living out of my scribbling. i did, however, choose my main subject at university (business administration) mostly because the courses at that department were mainly built around case studies and written papers instead of exams. that turned out well, didn’t it – a professor once told me my paper (i think it was my bachelor’s thesis) was too funny to be submitted, apparently you’re not supposed to have a laugh at an academic contribution. right. duly noted. note to self: learn to become dull, and find a real job.
so i did, and so i have. but i get bored after five minutes of playing dull, and what’s more, i just can’t seem to keep away from the pen.
the nudges from within are getting stronger each passing year, there are so many words waiting to be written…