Okay, here’s the deal. I really dislike February. And right from the start this year, February delivered. Snow, snow, snow…
I wish I was the sporty type. I’d probably have a blast this month – skiing, skating, whatever. But I’m not. After so many years trying, and getting angry when failing, I’ve come to terms with it. I’m just not made for all the huffing and puffing winter always asks of you. Or as a friend put it recently: “You’re not at all the physical type… you’re this emotional, intellectual creature.”
I can live with that. That’s actually one of the most accurate descriptions I’ve heard in a long time. I rather liked beginning the year getting that epithet. It’s actually right up there with international woman of mystery that I was labelled with a few years ago.
Funny really, how I seem to be the kind of person that people always have an opinion on. I try to keep to the background as long as possible, simply to see what I’m up against. The people who merely cross my path when I’m in observing mode will most likely think I’m a grey mouse. Not a key player at all. And that’s actually an advantage. I’ve come to realise that not everyone knows how to do that; blend in and pay attention to what’s going on. Letting others steal the spotlight. But then, suddenly, ’nuff is ’nuff. And as I step out of the shadows, the tagging begins.
It’s taken me almost 30 years to understand that what they call me often reflects them more than it does me. People making jokes on someone else’s expense are often doing so because they feel threatened. The louder they get, the sadder the sight they are. Joke’s on them.
It’s taken me almost half of that time to furthermore realise I don’t need to associate with people who don’t have anything kind to say. Same goes for everyone of us. If someone doesn’t like you; if someone treats you like an option, why don’t you make both their and your own lives easier by removing yourself from the equation. Stick with the people that do not disparage you, and remember never to downgrade anyone either. Even if you don’t like that person. In the end, kindness always pays off.
So hello February. Please be kind to me, and I’ll try to not feel so intimidated by you. Better yet, pass quickly, and I’ll stay silent here in my little emotional hibernation bubble.